Archive for Bad Horror

Psychopaths and Super Powers Don’t Mix (Review of Thirst)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , , on February 23, 2010 by Julianne

I will be the first to admit that when it comes to keeping up with foreign films, I’m terrible at it.  Every once in a while, though, a film will come to my attention, either by popularity within the horror community or because it’s a director I’ve seen and loved and I just have to see their new film.  Thirst falls into the later category.  Well…and sort of into the former – really, was I supposed to resist a Korean vampire flick about a priest?  Come on. Continue reading


Murder isn’t pretty, but Suspiria is (Review of Suspiria)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , on February 18, 2010 by Julianne

First off, I apologize for my long absence.  I have in no way, shape, or form given up on horror reviewing, watching and snarking.  I just had to do some “life” things first – like have guests stay over…guests who don’t love horror the way I do…and who perhaps might not have appreciated my house being super dirty.  Anyway, I’m back and hopefully will not be interrupted for some time now.  Anyway, I digress.  As interesting as my personal life is, I will get on to what we’re all really here for: a review of the 1977 classic horror, Suspiria.

Continue reading

When Good God goes Bad (Review of Legion)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , on January 25, 2010 by Julianne

As promised, I dedicated two hours of my life this weekend to seeing Legion. Let me first say this: it’s not good.  However, if you’re craving an in theatre horror film in the next week or so and it’s between Legion or Daybreakers, see Legion.  It’s probably technically the worse of the two films but given the humorous lines in it (both intentional and unintentional) and the fact that I absolutely LOVE Dennis Quaid, possibly more than is natural, I just much more enjoyed the viewing experience of Legion.  In fact, I sort of liked it in that “wow this is awful and kind of makes my brain go ow” sort of way.  Continue reading

This Movie Sucks (Review of Daybreakers)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , on January 21, 2010 by Julianne

Get it?  Vampires?  Sucks?  Ok, so my boyfriend came up with that one.  It made me laugh.  I’m corny.  Get over it.  This movie does suck though.  If you will recall, I did a preview review of Daybreakers a while back.  I was puzzled.  On the one hand, yay vampires that are not emo and sparkly and yay awesome cast.  On the other hand, boo weird human harvest matrix theme and boo odd bat-Nosferatu vampires.  As the release of the film grew closer, I got kind of excited.  I’m not exactly sure why, but I had a good feeling.  Not a good “Oh wow, this will be a new legendary horror film” feeling but a good “I think I may enjoy this” feeling. Continue reading

A Psychadelic Vacation to the Emerald Isle (Review of Shrooms)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , on January 21, 2010 by Julianne

I am a very strong believer that horror is one of those genres crucially affected by viewing environment.  Seeing a good bad horror in a theatre is often key; the audience laughing with you at the ridiculousness just makes the whole thing worthwhile as opposed to just sort of sad.  Watching horror films alone on a rainy night can always make them seem scarier.  Watching horror films with fellow horror fans can lead to an overdose of horror cynicism.  Given that, I decided, against my better judgement, to give another chance to Shrooms.  I saw Shrooms at the 2007 Irish Film Institute’s Horrorthon as the surprise film.  Half of the audience, having already seen the movie, either booed, yelled at the screen, or even walked out.  The rest gladly joined in the jeering.  Given that atmosphere, I thought, “maybe I should give the movie another shot, on my own.  Maybe I’ll change my mind.”

Continue reading

The Week in Previews 1/21/10…or just Legion…

Posted in Upcoming Films with tags , , , on January 21, 2010 by Julianne

So…this morning did not start as expected.  It is raining in Los Angeles which I HATE because no one can drive in the rain in this city, my throat hurts, and I mistakenly left a bottle of champagne in the freezer overnight, which exploded and has left said freezer smelling oh so slightly of Andre.  I had every intention of editing and publishing two reviews waiting in the wings of truly terrible horror films.  Then I saw this and I had to share because it is very rare that something makes me laugh out loud in my office. Continue reading

Birth Control 2.0 (Review of Grace)

Posted in Reviews with tags , , , , on November 30, 2009 by Julianne

Blood: it does a body good

Grace is one of those films that I knew I had to check out as soon as I saw the trailer for it.  I’m sure it’s pretty clear from my other postings that I’m not a big fan of the blood guts and gore = OMGSOSCARED films that seem to have become the new definition of horror in our generation (seriously, CGI is ruining cinema…but that’s another story…and it’s called Avatar…).  I like subtlety.  I like films that have some depth.  Maybe the horror won’t make you jump out of your seat or be looking over your shoulder for monsters, but it will make you think, make you realize the horror in a situation and brood on it.  At it’s very best, it will make you subconsciously terrified as hell (like, in my opinion, a film like Rosemary’s Baby does, or even, in more modern blockbusters, The Ring did on many levels, once you scraped away the external elements of Naomi Watt’s blank stare and the CGI girl walking out of the TV).  Grace looked to be one of those films.  From the preview, you can’t quite tell what’s going on – is it real?  Did this stillborn child really reincarnate through some sacred (or, more aptly, unholy) magic?  Or did a woman on the verge of desperation retreat into insanity when faced with inconceivable tragedy?  Plays on psychosis and supernatural evil are delicious to me; they toy with your mind until every instant in the film becomes suspicious and unnerving. Continue reading